Monday, March 30, 2009

Rookie Dad: Baby needs a new pair of socks


The youngling has an ongoing obsession with her socks. Maybe it's more of a battle against them. Whatever the case, she seems to be either obsessed with her footwear or deeply despises whichever socks I wrestle on to her feet each morning.

No matter the true answer, the socks never stay on. Having recently discovered her feet, she incessantly tugs at her socks. Sometimes she wakes up with the socks nowhere in sight. She is either good at hiding them somewhere nearby or has eaten them while she sleeps. And before you think to yourself, "Hey, bub, there's no way a 19 week-old baby can eat socks" you need to realize how crafty the Youngling is. I actually saw her after she had silenty woken from a nap with her sock, liberated from her foot, in her mouth. Is this a problem I need to keep my eyes open for? I haven't seen any choking hazard-type warnings stapled to packages of tiny socks but if this baby is capable of anything, it's creating a need for one more product warning.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Rookie Dad: What goes down must come up


I always thought the phrase was "what goes up must come down". It has something to do with gravity. Gravity, though, is a rule that doesn't apply to my baby. Yesterday morning as I fed her she seemed abnormally hungry. She greedily sucked down most of the bottle's contents which meant it was time to dress her for the day. Some sporty sweats were just the ticket for an energetic 4 month old on the go.

She had other plans.


Before I could fully dress her, she began coughing. I have learned that this is a signal to sit her up and see what happens. Sometimes the coughing is due to her trying to eat her fist, sometimes it isn't. This time wasn't from her fist becoming a meal.

As I sat her up, she instantly expelled the offending material. That's code for "she puked up five ounces of milk". But I dealt with it and sopped up the warm mess and proceeded to try dressing her again. Success at last.

Until I heard the magical words as I showered. "Oh, crap." No further explanation, just a pile of baby clothes on the floor as I scoped out the situation minutes later and a raised voice from downstairs asking me to take the sheet off her mattress. It seems that this particular baby had now changed her mind about what she had for breakfast and was sending this meal back to the kitchen. Tough luck for her because the only thing on the menu at the baby cafe is milk and the menu doesn't change for quite some time.

If you're a parent, you know that things happen in threes. That was when baby puke was discovered matted in her hair on the back of her head. A quick trip to the Lil' Baby Hair Salon was now in order. So much for breakfast. That little girl is going to be high maintenance. But it gets easier, right?

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Rookie Dad: an introduction


I optimistically entered into fatherhood in November. I knew little of what to expect and had heard plenty of nightmarish stories about babies waking up every two hours during the night screaming and foul smelling diapers that would scare veteran sanitation specialists.

Sure, much of my pre-fatherhood education came from the movie Knocked Up but I still felt reasonably prepared.


Fast forward four months to current time.

In those four months my education has been by way of trial and error. I've seen multiple surfaces soaked and/or covered in pee. I've been on the receiving end of diaper changes that ended up taking not one or two diapers but up to four because sometimes a little girl just can't stop a good thing.

Thankfully, the midnight feedings have been nearly non-existent. Sure, yesterday morning's first feeding found me as the recipient of a milk fountain from her mouth. Hey, at least it was warm but on the down side I was already dressed for work. Oh well.

If you're curious what other bumbling baby and dad adventures are happening, keep checking back here.